In Response to "Stirring the Pot" and UPDATE

Tonight I came across a blog that set my blood boiling.  Army Wife, Army Life wrote a post calling out the National Guard saying that our spouses are NOT soldiers and that we cannot call ourselves Army Wives.  Through a friend's suggestion - I removed the link to her post because I just won't give her any more traffic to her blog.  (UPDATE:  Since the social media firestorm, her blog has now officially been removed!)

Well, let's just say that did not sit well with me at all -- and me being not one to keep my mouth shut had a lengthy response written and all ready to post -- until I discovered that she shut down comments for her blog.  If you can't stand the heat.....

But I still have a response to you sweetheart......read on......

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First of all - yes, this is your blog and you are entitled to your opinion. But, if you are not prepared for the backlash of comments in response to your ignorance, then you should have just kept your little “Army Wife” mouth shut.  And obviously you couldn't handle the responses because you shut down comments on your blog.

Second - how DARE you. How DARE you think that you and your husband are so far above any National Guard service member and to say that we don’t rate ourselves as Army wives or that our husbands can't call themselves soldiers. How about you say those words to the widow of a great man that we just buried from our battalion this past August because he was shot down in his helicopter in Afghanistan? Or how about you say to the other SOLDIERS from his unit that their PTSD does not matter because they are not soldiers - according to YOUR definition.

I HAVE been an active duty wife. My husband served in active duty for 6 years. After a distinguished career in active duty, he choose to join the National Guard and I now proudly call myself an ARMY WIFE. As a National Guard SOLDIER, my husband puts on the uniform EVERY SINGLE DAY and reports to work at the base. He was under the impression that by joining the National Guard, things would slow down (the one-weekend a month, 2-weeks a year that you refer to). We couldn’t have been more wrong.

Since joining the National Guard, he has been deployed multiple times, participated in the same training exercises that “Big Army” does, is gone for weeks, often months, at a time for training courses and schools (just like your husband would be), has been called out in the middle of the night for state or national emergencies, and has been supporting active duty units that can’t support themselves while they are CONUS. Not to mention that over half of the National Guard are prior active duty (meaning that they come from ALL services) And so you want to tell them that they are not “real soldiers”?

And now, I have issue with some of your points:

“Respect the higher ranks. When I met my husband's 1SG, I made sure to put my best foot forward. I put on a nice outfit, did my hair, and put makeup on my face. Used manners; ma'am, sir, please, and thank you. I sat quietly and spoke only when addressed. If I had a question, I waited for a break in the conversation, and said 'Excuse me.' It's simple really. I see none of this when Vermont Guard spouses get together for an event with their spouses.” 　

Boy, you sure make us National Guard wives out to be a bunch of hicks. Let me just tuck my bra strap in my shirt and put down my beer can before I say that obviously, you have not been around active duty wives too much sweetheart. Because, unfortunately, there are active duty wives out there who can’t spell manners, let alone know the meaning of it. So before you lump all of us into an uneducated, unmannered group of misfits, take a drive down Main Street of an active duty base….and then we’ll talk.


“Respect your husband when he's in uniform. Just because my husband and I aren't on post when he's in his uniform, I keep the 'handling' to a minimum. Technically, you aren't even supposed to hold hands with him when he's in uniform. I keep a hand on the Hub's elbow, or not at all. I don't sit on his lap, I don't make out with him, we hardly kiss for that matter. I see none of this when Vermont Guard spouses are together.”

Hold on one second while I take my tongue out of my husband’s mouth….and let me refer you again to the above statement.


“Respect the uniform itself. Don't put it on and take sexy pictures with it, with boobs/butt falling out all over the place. That's just trashy. A fun picture with his cover on is one thing, flaunting your assests is another."

Ok, I need to stop laughing before I respond to this one. Have you seriously read what you wrote? “Don’t put it on and take sexy pictures…” However, you husband responds in his defense of your writing that, and I quote, "She looks great and very sexy in the uniform” Ummmm….have you LOOKED at the picture on your blog??? Oh, and please use spell check for “assets”.


You have been a military wife for less than a year. I have been a military wife for almost 17 years now. I dare you to respond to me and not call me an Army wife. I dare you to tell the widow of that helicopter pilot of more than 20+ years that she is not an Army wife. I could sit here and bash your husband and not call him a “real soldier” because he’s just a recruiter, but I would not lower myself to your standards. Your husband is a soldier -- just like mine. We’re supposed to be on the same side -- fighting for the same cause -- for the country we love.


UPDATE:

The commander of a Vermont-based Army recruiting station issued a public apology yesterday  afternoon for the remarks made by a soldier there on an inflammatory, viral blog post written by that soldier’s wife that sent the online spouse community into a whirlwind.