Go To School, Get Hit With A Taser

How would you like to come home one afternoon and listen to this message on your voice mail:


"Please speak with your child to see if they were indeed tasered by the sheriff's department at school today"

WTF????

"In Leadville, CO, a Lake County Sheriff's deputy was put on unpaid administrative leave after he used a dry Taser to shock 30 students. The sheriff's department, among other businesses, were participating in a career fair held at Lake County High School that morning.   According to school administrators, the students asked the deputy to shock them so they knew what it felt like.  Two of the students received minor burns and were taken to a local hospital. They were treated and released. A student says one female student was shocked seven times at her request."

SERIOUSLY??  AND HE AGREED??

What part of this deputy's brain was missing when he agreed to taser these kids when they asked.  Uh, Mr. Deputy?  These are kids!  You are the adult!  And what on God's green earth made you keep going after tasering one kid?  30 kids??  Did you have a line of kids just waiting for their turn to be shocked?  Seriously, Cletus -- couldn't you have picked one of your deputy friends to shock?  "Hey Bob - wanna show these kids a demonstration?"

And I'm sorry - where was the school administration while 30 of their students were having their brain cells shocked into oblivion?  Well, read on.....

"Betty Kokenes, the school superintendent, says she had no idea students were being shocked. "I believe it's not appropriate and it wasn't an authorized activity," she said.  She says she is investigating if any teachers saw it happen."

(Banging my head against the wall.....)

Dear sweet, stupid Betty.  You need to put the liquor away and wise up.  Do you really think that even if this WAS an authorized activity, that parents would be flocking to your doorsteps with signed permission slips?

"Yes, Superintendent Betty!!  Please taser little Johnny during Career Day!  He's been a pain in our ass ever since he turned 16.  Maybe Deputy Cletus can shock some sense into him!"

Also, I'm betting my kid's college fund that there were a few teachers that saw what was happening.  Heck - they probably encouraged some of their trouble-maker students to "go for it", promising extra credit in chemistry if they wrote a report on what it felt like to be tasered -- that is -- after they regain consciousness.

"Betty Benson, Lake County Sheriff's spokesperson says this is not a common practice and should not have happened.  The deputy designed a waiver while at the fair and asked students to sign it if they wanted to be shocked.  Benson says she does not believe it was an official document."

Ok, I seriously want to know what is it with stupid women named "Betty" in Leadville.  They are just giving Betty's everywhere a bad name!  

But back to the issue at hand.  That "waiver" was probably something equivalent to writing down your phone number on a bar napkin at last call.  So, no Betty Benson -- that would NOT be an official document.

"When asked if she thought that was ridiculous Benson said, "We haven't had that discussion yet, but that would be my opinion."

Betty, Betty, Betty -- you are not redeeming yourself in my eyes.  Why is there even a need to hold a discussion about whether or not this was ridiculous??

"A letter was sent out and a phone call was made to many parents letting them know about the situation. It also asked parents to check their children for any marks."

Yep, I can just see this conversation at dinner that night.

"Susie - did you do something different to your hair today?  It looks so frizzy and full!  And honey, what are those marks on your lower back?"

"The case has been turned over to the Lake County District Attorney's office which will decide if the deputy will face any charges.  The deputy's name was not released."

Not releasing his name is probably one of the smarter things you've done so far.  But I'll tell -- CLETUS!!  His name is DEPUTY CLETUS!!

I am extremely grateful that I DON'T live in Leadville!  And if I did, I'd be looking to move out of that school district -- and FAST!  I just hope they didn't use the "Hello Kitty" taser!