Saving & Giving Challenge - Days #5 & #6

Day #5
*I'm starting to feel that maybe being so open about my struggle addiction is really not such a good idea.  I'm feeling like I'm under a microscope.  I'm feeling judged.  I'm feeling like I'll be criticized for every purchase I make....."Oh, well she's trying to save money and get out of debt, but look what she just bought".  I feel like I'm under a microscope.....but it's a microscope I put myself under willingly.  I chose to bring my story to the light.  But now it's a choice I may be regretting.   I can't put the crap back in the horse.  It's out there now.  A big steamy pile that everyone can see and smell.....and turn their nose up at......and shake their heads at me thinking "what have you done".  I worry about what people will think of me, that I will lose friends, that I'll be lectured.  I spent a good part of the day in turmoil over this.

*Normally, after gymnastics and ballet we would go to the Farmer's Market, which is at Southlands. Since I did my produce shopping at Sprouts this week AND there was the big sidewalk sale going on this weekend, I just avoided the temptation and we just didn't go at all.

*Earlier this week, a friend had mentioned she had a friend coming into town and that we should go out. I immediately jumped in and said YES....and to let me know when so I can get a sitter. As I was laying in bed tonight, it hit me.....I can't go out. That would require spending money -- on a sitter, on drinks, maybe on food. SHIT! I took a breath, texted my friend and told her that I can't go out with her and her friend. She responded that she totally understood. I really do have some great, supportive friends.

*I got no purging done at all today.  Actually, I take that back.....I purged a few things from my DVR.....and by "purged", I meant seeing unproductively on my couch blowing through my DVR'd episodes of Ink Master.


Day #6
*Ups and downs.  This journey is just full of ups and downs.

*I went to the bank to withdraw cash for the girls.  (PLANNED)  When it's our payday, it's payday for the girls and their allowance too.  If there's one thing I'm fanatical about with them -- it's teaching them good money habits now.  I don't want them to be me in 30 years.....starting their own blog or having their own Facebook page, writing about their struggles with debt.  So we do the "Save, Spend, and Share" jars with them and they divide their allowance by threes.  (I'll write more about this a little later)

*As I was on Facebook throughout the day, I would remove pages that would be a temptation to me.....Groupon, Amazon, Michaels, JoAnns, ARC Thrift Store, Goodwill.  If I thought any page would tempt me to click and spend, it was gone.

*Another friend suggested I give myself an "allowance" to spend.  I will consider that once this challenge is over.....but for this month, it's cold turkey.  No extra spending - period.  I chose to challenge myself this way.  I started a green post-it note....this is where I write down everytime I wanted to spend money.  I write down what I wanted to buy and how much it was.  By the end of the month, I'll have an estimated amount of how much unnecessary spending I truly do.......and I can't do this project if I give myself an allowance.