Starting Therapy......
>> Wednesday, January 19, 2011
So, I made a big decision for my mental health.
I'm starting therapy.
It's not a big deal, really. Or is it?
A friend of mine is a counselor and is sponsoring a grad student who needs some guinea pigs patients to practice on. There's a lot of positives around this:
1) Sessions would only be about $5. (Leave it up to me to find a deal on therapy!)
2) I get to help her student with her counseling skills
3) I get someone to help me figure out why I'm so neurotic
I have a meeting with her next Monday as a "getting-to-know you" session. She said that this will help us decide where we want to go with my sessions.
Where I want to go? Heck, where do I begin?
Do I begin with the the fact that I've made a lot of mistakes in my past. Big, HUGE mistakes for which I cannot forgive myself yet.
Do I begin with that because I can't forgive myself that I feel that I don't deserve anything good or that I cannot accept a compliment or that I can't list 5 positive things about myself - let alone ONE thing.
Do I begin with the fact that I'm a recoving compulsive shopper and that I have relapse after relapse?
Do I begin with the fact that I feel like a bad mother 90% of the time?
Do I begin with the rough patch that hubby and I had before we had Nani - and that I'm still trying to work through that hurt?
Do I begin with the fact that I have issues with my own mother that I'm really trying hard to work out?
Where exactly do I begin?
Poor thing -- she has no idea what she's getting into. She may look at me after our first session and decide to change her major to something -- like quantum physics -- which would be a lot easier than helping me work through all my issues.
But, we shall see..........
